While cleaning out our basement the other day Matt came upon a photo collage I made for my college dorm room my freshmen year. Which, as you know, I stayed in one night and one night only. The year was 2001. I was 17 years old. And I have some advice for that version of myself.
Disclaimer. All photos below were taken with my iPhone. Photos of actual photos if you will. Just what it is.
- You will never have this body ever again. That teeny waist? Between college and then kids it's gone. Long gone the way of the flared jeans. Wear a bikini you. As often as appropriate. Or maybe lay off the chicken tenders.
- Tweezers are your enemy right now. Listen to your mother. Step away from the tweezers and let those poor long lost brows grow in. Invest in an eyebrow pencil till then. Please. Your future brows are ashamed of you. Oh and don't worry. Accutane is in your future.
- You are not a flower child. Flowers in hair is a poor choice. They'll make fun of you too. They will call you the Statue of Liberty. Yup.
- No. Just. No.
- This is ridiculous. What were you thinking? Your mother is going to lose this handkerchief in the wash and it's not even yours. Teen Beats are better with a shirt that has a back. And is that crimped hair I see? You didn't do it in the 80's, why now?
- This sweatshirt. The one you were supposed to return with the rest of your Track & Field uniform? You've only had a year or two in with it at this point but you will own it into your 30's. Treat it with love and respect. And don't worry. That hole that is developing around the left wrist??? Well it will open up to match the right side AND it will be the first thumb hole top you own. You're a trendsetter and you didn't even know it.
- You're calf-less. Go for a run for goodness sake. Your 30 year old self is calling. Go get a pair of ankles Laur.
- Don't cry so much at graduation. You'll look like hell the next day. And you really won't miss high school at all. Those two girls sitting on either side of you? Don't worry. They won't go anywhere. It's been 13 years and they are still here so I figure you're good. Unless you do something really awful like never visit their adorable baby (I will soon Amber I promise!).
- Bathroom selfies are a thing now. They just don't work for you and your choker necklace. 
- If you thought dressing matchy matchy was cool then just wait. Matchy matchy is my game. Family photos just aren't good if we aren't all in a similar hue. If only the Scopes guys would have found us then they would have had a field day. But at least we have this little beauty.
You do well for yourself Laur, you do. Just as long as you fix those brows. The sooner the better. Oh and never cut your hair. You'll regret it. Twice.
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